Neon orange, the new good luck omen
Thu, 29/04/10 – 13:31 | Comments Off
Neon orange, the new good luck omen

I should know by now not to let the guys have any say in my makeup – the results usually turn me into a clown or a punk rocker.
For some reason, though, nail polish amuses …

No, the government can’t limit your salt. But you should
Tue, 27/04/10 – 21:52 | Comments Off
No, the government can’t limit your salt. But you should

Calm down, folks. Uncle Sam isn’t going to bang in your door and confiscate your salt shaker. Though it’s really not a bad idea.
According to a very poorly phrased Rasmussen poll, 55 percent of the …

If you keep at it, you will win. Sort of.
Tue, 27/04/10 – 13:28 | 2 Comments
If you keep at it, you will win. Sort of.

For a week running, Big Guy’s lunch box has come home clean as a whistle.
Salad with “dranch” dressing – devoured.
Fresh fruit – sucked down.
Sub sandwich with lunch meat that’s a tad saltier than I’d prefer …

It’s not the medium. It’s what you put out there
Mon, 26/04/10 – 21:32 | One Comment
It’s not the medium. It’s what you put out there

Note to California State Sen. Ellen Corbett: Social networking sites do not post personal information about minors. The minors themselves do that.
That’s why Corbett’s bill, which The Sacramento Bee says would ban sites from posting …

Warning: Be sure to arrange a tour of the men’s room
Mon, 26/04/10 – 12:53 | 2 Comments
Warning: Be sure to arrange a tour of the men’s room

Here’s a free tip, and one that I’ve never found in any parenting book: When your boys get old enough to branch out on their own, book a familiarization tour of the men’s room. Have …

What’s in Dad’s care package
Sun, 25/04/10 – 8:40 | Comments Off
What’s in Dad’s care package

We went a little bit nuts this time – as in peanuts, pistachios and the requisite Payday candy bars. I’ll admit, it’s a little weird to send pistachios to Afghanistan, a country that grows so …

A Friday date with a boy
Fri, 23/04/10 – 13:00 | Comments Off
A Friday date with a boy

It started as a bribe one Friday when I needed to take Dad’s weekly package to the post office but Boots was starving because snack had been something odious that day at school. It probably …

A SWAT for refusing to let the birth certificate nonissue die
Thu, 22/04/10 – 18:03 | Comments Off
A SWAT for refusing to let the birth certificate nonissue die

It’s kind of ironic, given that John McCain was the subject of the original birther lawsuit, that Arizona is like a pit bull after a steak when the citizenship at issue is Barack Obama’s.
Or not …

No sissies, ladies or princesses here
Thu, 22/04/10 – 13:33 | Comments Off
No sissies, ladies or princesses here

C’mon, princess! Did ya forget your crown? Can’t you throw harder than that? You’re not even trying.
Seconds later, “princess” – a gangly ballcap-wearing pre-teen boy – did indeed throw harder. Accurately, too, and his heckler …

Green behaviors common in the U.S.? That’s hard to believe
Wed, 21/04/10 – 17:51 | Comments Off
Green behaviors common in the U.S.? That’s hard to believe

Ever since I’ve moved to California, I’ve enjoyed the benefits of curb-side recycling.
It really couldn’t be an easier: Separate your trash in the house and select the appropriate bin outside in which to deposit it. …

The case of the hug-happy kid
Wed, 21/04/10 – 13:19 | Comments Off
The case of the hug-happy kid

As far as discipline problems go, it’s a not-bad one to have. It’s preferable to biting, hitting, kicking, pinching, etc.
It’s still annoying, though, and it’s getting Boots in trouble somewhere virtually every day: At school, …

When your sick child really isn’t
Tue, 20/04/10 – 18:11 | Comments Off
When your sick child really isn’t

They’re probably not doing it because they’re out to get you – though it feels like it sometimes – but you’re right about the second part: Day cares do send kids home when they’re not …

Join the club at the clubhouse
Tue, 20/04/10 – 15:53 | Comments Off
Join the club at the clubhouse

Mom, can I have a rope, Big Guy asked yesterday afternoon.
It’s in the garage in the party box, I replied, and before you jump to conclusions about what kind of parties we through around here …

What’s in Dad’s care package
Sun, 18/04/10 – 9:12 | Comments Off
What’s in Dad’s care package

Though Dad hasn’t been outside the wire yet for long enough to experience the side effects of Meals, Ready to Eat – there’s a reason they’re nicknamed Meals Refusing to Exit – that day’s coming. …

Egg-free dessert pizza
Sat, 17/04/10 – 9:12 | Comments Off
Egg-free dessert pizza

This is another fine mess that Club Penguin and my big mouth got me into.
There’s one section of the online community where kids can earn “money” by making pizza – decidedly strange pizza, with ingredients …

If I had a Thing …
Fri, 16/04/10 – 15:22 | Comments Off
If I had a Thing …

(All misspellings are by the author. Not that the Web master does much better on any given day.)
If i had a thing I would cich it.
I would take the kite away fron him.
If the thing …

Trying not to turn Air Force One into a helicopter
Thu, 15/04/10 – 13:03 | Comments Off
Trying not to turn Air Force One into a helicopter

A funny thing happened on the way to the White House.
As he “researched” information for his first-ever report – one page on a historical site, with a picture from which he could create a drawing …

Big Guy and the stinky, awful book
Wed, 14/04/10 – 13:11 | Comments Off
Big Guy and the stinky, awful book

When it comes to disappointing gifts, I’m a veteran.
Back when I was in my 20s, my grandmother gave me underwear for three Christmases in a row. The first year, I was amused. The second, I …

School lunch do-gooding takes a goofy turn
Tue, 13/04/10 – 19:06 | Comments Off
School lunch do-gooding takes a goofy turn

Foods made with white sugar, fructose, corn syrup, or any thing ending in “-ose” are banned – presumably, this doesn’t apply to lactose – but peanut butter laced with honey is OK.
Crackers …

The word on the street about the Tooth Fairy
Tue, 13/04/10 – 12:48 | Comments Off
The word on the street about the Tooth Fairy

Big Guy’s had a loose tooth for more than a year now. Or so he thought.
He first “noticed it” early last spring and charged into the bathroom to ask me to examine what he thought …

Daily journal serves double duty when Dad’s deployed
Mon, 12/04/10 – 13:55 | Comments Off
Daily journal serves double duty when Dad’s deployed

For Big Guy, the timing couldn’t have been better on Dad’s arrival at his base in Afghanistan.
Dad was getting settled just as Big Guy’s school had a round of parent-teacher conferences. Big Guy’s went well, …

What’s in Dad’s care package
Sun, 11/04/10 – 8:54 | 2 Comments
What’s in Dad’s care package

This package was the birthday party edition – of sorts.
We could have ordered a cake or pie from various Web sites, but those are around $25 for an eight-inch pastry plus shipping of at least …

Egg-free brownies for Dad’s birthday
Sat, 10/04/10 – 8:52 | Comments Off
Egg-free brownies for Dad’s birthday

I thought this was going to be a stumper that involved a week of failed kitchen experiments: Create an egg-free brownie recipe that tastes good but is stable enough to survive a trip to Afghanistan …

Pineapple cake filling
Sat, 10/04/10 – 7:46 | Comments Off
Pineapple cake filling

Sometimes, it’s not that hard to spend a few extra minutes to get rid of some dye and high-fructose corn syrup.
Such is the case with this cake filling recipe. You could easily open a can …

Don’t let the baseball bugs bite!
Fri, 9/04/10 – 13:57 | Comments Off
Don’t let the baseball bugs bite!

Glove: Check.
Bat: Check.
Water bottle: Check.
Batting helmet: Uh, Mom, I don’t know where it is.
Didn’t I tell you to put all your baseball stuff in your bag?
The helmet won’t fit in my bag, Big Guy retorted.
Dang …

When the ‘profits first’ policy fails – disastrously
Thu, 8/04/10 – 19:02 | Comments Off
When the ‘profits first’ policy fails – disastrously

It’s not as if big coal companies ever have been benevolent societies – the song “Sixteen Tons” and its lyrics about owing your soul to the company store stemmed from a miner’s reality.
It’s not as …

When the baby’s no longer “the” baby
Thu, 8/04/10 – 12:34 | One Comment
When the baby’s no longer “the” baby

If anyone’s station in life seemingly was secure, Boots’ was.
He’s the youngest grandchild on each side, thus ensuring his lifelong position as “The Baby.”
Ay, but no one ever warned him that there would be other …

What’s in Dad’s care package
Sun, 4/04/10 – 8:45 | Comments Off
What’s in Dad’s care package

Dad demurs, but we insist: You will get a weekly package, we tell him.
Though he says he has access to a decent PX, we wanted to make sure he has plenty of his favorite snacks …